So we wait...

It's been almost 90 days since we "met" Emmy Xiang. How blessed we are now, just knowing that she is ours. But, though I know that God is working all the details to His purposes, I find myself worrying, wondering...and I find that I must ask myself, Am I really trusting Him? And when I am honest, I must say I am not.

I know in my head that His ways, His timing are absolutely perfect. However, my sinful, deceitful heart suggests that, "it's not fair!" or I'm not getting what I deserve. I must constantly remind myself (and be reminded by my dear husband and others) of Truth. What I deserve is not what I'm getting, thankfully. God has been so merciful and kind to me. I simply don't deserve His grace. I must remind myself that it is God who is sovereign and in control of all things...not me, not the CCAA, not our agency...GOD. He has a perfect plan. His plan for now is to wait and trust Him.

So though we're still not in the "match room" at CCAA, still have no letter for us to sign reaffirming our resolve to bring Emmy Xiang home, still no passports for the girls, still no frenzy to arrange travel plans and pack, I will trust Him. I will joyfully wait...and enjoy this time of anticipation, of loving my family, of fellowship with friends, of service to others, of looking ahead with my husband toward our future.

All glory, honor and praise be to our God, who is worthy of all our gratefulness for His mercy and goodness to me! I will thank Him, will look to His word for Truth.

Wait for the LORD; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the LORD!
~Psalm 27:14

Psalm 111
1 Praise the Lord!
I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart,
in the company of the upright, in the congregation.
2 Great are the works of the Lord,
studied by all who delight in them.
3 Full of splendor and majesty is his work,
and his righteousness endures forever.
4 He has caused his wondrous works to be remembered;
the Lord is gracious and merciful.
5 He provides food for those who fear him;
he remembers his covenant forever.
6 He has shown his people the power of his works,
in giving them the inheritance of the nations.
7 The works of his hands are faithful and just;
all his precepts are trustworthy;
8 they are established forever and ever,
to be performed with faithfulness and uprightness.
9 He sent redemption to his people;
he has commanded his covenant forever.
Holy and awesome is his name!
10 The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom;
all those who practice it have a good understanding.
His praise endures forever!

I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in his word I hope; ~Psalm 130:5

The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me;
your steadfast love, O LORD, endures forever. ~Psalm 138:8

The LORD is righteous in all his ways and kind in all his works.
The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. ~Psalm 145:17-18